MARKET: Company adopts agile methodology to be able to run late more often
With two-week sprints, the team began delivering late predictably — which, according to the board, represents 'a huge leap in predictability.'
- methodology
- management
- sprint
notice: This is satire. Names, companies and telemetry are invented. Any resemblance to your environment is your problem.
The adoption of the agile method was announced as a milestone in the company's digital transformation. Six months later, the internal review shows that the number of delays rose 40%, but the ability to predict the delay improved "dramatically."
"Before, we ran late and found out at the end of the month. Now we know on the Monday of the first week that we are going to run late," celebrated the project manager. "That is maturity."
Among the gains listed in the report are the fifteen-minute daily ceremony — which lasts, on average, thirty-eight — the task board with four columns, and point-based estimation, whose scale has never been documented and which each person interprets their own way.
The digital transformation committee said the next step is adopting a second methodology, to "give the process flexibility."
Satire. Invented numbers, shared pain.